The Pandemic of Loneliness

I lost a dear cousin brother in the COVID pandemic early this year. We had grown up together and many a warm summer day had been spend together engaged in fun and simple leisure that only children and teenagers of my age could indulge in those days. He was the leader of the pack, a keen sense of humor, a responsible family member and a trail blazer for the rest of us. And yet as he struggled with the virus, As life slowly ebbed away, for all the advances that we have made in healthcare; his last days were very lonely. Social media and Messaging could not possibly convey to him what a valuable soul he was - the heart beat of the extended family. What would have gone through his mind? Vacillating between hope and hopelessness, worry and positivity, responsibility he felt and the tenacious spirit to cling on to every breath. Fear, Despair, Love, Affection - I'm sure a million thoughts went through his mind. And then he was gone, just like he had arrived in this world with a blank canvas he left with a beautiful collage of deeds, family values, success, community building and social work. 

Loneliness when you are separated from loved ones is a scary enough thought but so many of us live with a scarier thought - being lonely without being separated from those that we love. Isolated amidst a sea of people. Ego, Opinions, Disconnect and Apathy build even more powerful walls than the hospital environment that encased the dear departed. The feeling of being suspended in a dark space where you can see no one - because they don't want to be seen, hear no one - because they don't want to speak, hanging treadbare with a sense of diminishing worth, a never ending emptiness, an aimless existence rather than a purposeful life.

And we do this to each other. In a healthy body we carry the virus of apathy, in a comfortable life we lack empathy, unable to differentiate when thoughts become opinions and finally harden into stubbornness. When our own being eclipses the acknowledgement of others. Another persons pain becomes an avoidable distraction. When we become larger than life itself. What is achieved by such a path, what is gained by this passive aggression. As social animals our well being is dependent as much on our thoughts as it is on the stimulation by others. There is only so much we can cope with ourselves. Without an outlet of a healthy dialogue, a moment of laughter the lights go out in the soul. 

As "I" takes centre stage, as big tech re-writes what society ought to look like, as every relationship becomes a balance sheet of wealth, fame, glory and persona: the soul suffers, withers and ultimately perishes. And to what end - isn't the canvas of life best embellished by our contributions, good deeds, propagating and enabling those that are vulnerable rather than a cacophony of I, me, myself. 

The pandemic of COVID may eventually come to an end but the pandemic of Loneliness is just beginning. 2020 and 2021 have put us in an environment of isolation, of forced loneliness. Let us learn our lessons and emerge out of this open-eyed hibernation to put these lessons to good use. Laugh, Love and Live my friends. May the goodness be with you.